Page 41 - Chupi-Todo
P. 41
W hen I was watching the episode, all the bad things that happened to me in my
childhood came in front of my eyes. It is sadly true that children don’t have the
courage to tell these horrible things to their parents and I couldn’t too.
When I was just 4 years old, my 25-year-old neighbour tried to touch his private
part to mine. He did bad things to my friends also since he had invited us to play at
his house. You see, I don’t have any other memories of that age except this one. So
you can understand how deeply this affected me.
When I was 10 years old, a friend of my father’s did the same to me. He had two
daughters who were my age. At that time also, I could not tell this to anyone. After
that, my mausaji tried to do something wrong with me at night and I woke up
and changed my place. In the morning, I tried to talk about this to my mother and
my mausi but they didn’t believe me and scolded me saying I would have done
something wrong. This gave me more pain than ever.
When I was 17 years old and went to give my engineering entrance exam in another
city, a relative of mine sexually abused me in the morning. I couldn’t understand
anything in the exam. I hated myself. All this time, I could not speak up because I
thought I was doing something wrong.
After today’s episode, I know I shouldn’t feel guilty. Guilty are those who did this
to me. I have tears in my eyes while writing this. I am feeling relieved of the pain
that I had buried in my heart for so many years.
-Sheela
Though sexual abuse can feel like a traumatic and life-altering
experience, recovery is certainly possible. Your abuse is not who you
are and doesn’t deine you. This isn’t the end of your life or your
goals or your happiness. You are bigger than your abuse.
Believe this.
CHUPPI TODO! | 39
childhood came in front of my eyes. It is sadly true that children don’t have the
courage to tell these horrible things to their parents and I couldn’t too.
When I was just 4 years old, my 25-year-old neighbour tried to touch his private
part to mine. He did bad things to my friends also since he had invited us to play at
his house. You see, I don’t have any other memories of that age except this one. So
you can understand how deeply this affected me.
When I was 10 years old, a friend of my father’s did the same to me. He had two
daughters who were my age. At that time also, I could not tell this to anyone. After
that, my mausaji tried to do something wrong with me at night and I woke up
and changed my place. In the morning, I tried to talk about this to my mother and
my mausi but they didn’t believe me and scolded me saying I would have done
something wrong. This gave me more pain than ever.
When I was 17 years old and went to give my engineering entrance exam in another
city, a relative of mine sexually abused me in the morning. I couldn’t understand
anything in the exam. I hated myself. All this time, I could not speak up because I
thought I was doing something wrong.
After today’s episode, I know I shouldn’t feel guilty. Guilty are those who did this
to me. I have tears in my eyes while writing this. I am feeling relieved of the pain
that I had buried in my heart for so many years.
-Sheela
Though sexual abuse can feel like a traumatic and life-altering
experience, recovery is certainly possible. Your abuse is not who you
are and doesn’t deine you. This isn’t the end of your life or your
goals or your happiness. You are bigger than your abuse.
Believe this.
CHUPPI TODO! | 39
